I may be broken. I can be inconsistent. I am a scared being masquerading with a hell of a poker face because I have felt the passion. I have felt the intimacy and the connection that another person can bring into life. I have seen the beauty of being vulnerable. I have seen the wonder of opening yourself truly and fully to another person. But I have also seen that come apart at the seams. I have watched it slowly unwind. I have seen the looks become more distant; the messages come less frequent; the conversations get more and more shallow. Then as quickly as the fire was lit, it is snuffed out and I am left figuring out if it was all worth it in the first place. I do have dreams. I have dreams about the day the battle doesn’t rage in my head. I have dreams about having a happy relationship; one that is filled with laughter and joy and adventure; one that is filled with passion and intimacy and love. I have dreams about a safe place to come home to, a place to make memories, and a place to build a life. And I have dreams about the person willing to stand by me long enough to see all of that come to pass. I can’t tell you when, but, hopefully one day.